Hello and Welcome!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to visit my blog, I really do appreciate you taking the time out of your hectic lives to read it!  I am currently in remission from Acute Myeloid Leukaemia which is a blood cancer!

Me feelin tough

So what happened??

This time last year I was a normal 39 year old mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, colleague...then very suddenly I was rushed into hospital and diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukaemia!  Yep it was literally all in the space of 24 hours!  I had been feeling unwell for about two weeks with flu like symptoms, never in a million years did I think it was cancer.  One day I was at home, the next I was in hospital being told I had very aggressive Leukaemia, had to start chemotherapy immediately, wouldn't be going home for weeks, wouldn't be able to have anymore children, would need lots of blood transfusions, needed a heart scan due to potential damage, needed antibiotics as I had no immunity so sepsis had set in and lots more that just blew my mind!

There are many different dimensions to being a cancer fighter, before it came and tapped me on the shoulder I certainly had no idea! I have been faced with my own mortality and can no longer hide under that comfort blanket of 'it will never happen to me' anymore.  We all know there is a chance something like this could happen to us, but when it actually does it is shattering.  

There were times when my world was pretty bleak with nothing but storm clouds above me. However, I can honestly say that even after what I had to endure the sun did shine again and lots of positives have come out it.  

The pictures above were taken during my first few days in hospital...before my hair started to fall out. As you can see I was seriously ill by the time I was admitted and have since learned that only 10% of my bone marrow contained normal cells!  At one point I had 10 lines into my body, in the last picture I am receiving chemotherapy, fluids, blood, have a tube in my nose to my stomach and am connected to a heart monitor.

Why am I doing this??

I decided to write the blog several reasons, to share my personal experience as well as information and advice on what has helped me and those around me cope. I am not sure where this will take me, but will write what I feel is relevant. I am also hoping to reach out to others as well as helping to raise awareness of blood cancer and it's symptoms.  Not forgetting how it impacts on those around us, it's tough for them too, feeling utterly helpless. They didn't have the cancer or have to fight it, but can be left traumatised by what they witnessed. When I was suffering terrible pain my husband would often say that he wished to take it away. Another time he said that our house didn't feel like a home anymore.

I am hoping that doing this will help to clear my head of all the thoughts and emotions swirling around, it has dawned on me that the mental scars may still be there long after the physical damage has healed.  And finally I've dreamed of being a writer since I was very young, perhaps now it will come true!

Here I am before Cancer!

In my dark hair days

Not long before diagnosis, my usual blonde hair

During my battle!!

Trying to smile

First few days in hospital...I look awful

Exhausted

With my amazing husband

With my super brave daughter

There are lots, lots more posts to come so please keep coming back, I have lots of ideas and things to write about.

You can contact me via the form on my blog if you want to get in touch, I would love to hear from you!  Follow via Bloglovin (link on this blog) to be notified of my updates, there is also a Facebook page 'Butterfly In Leukaemia Remission'.  I would also be extremely grateful if you would help me and my cause by sharing it too.

Many thanks & much love, Butterfly xx